Monday, May 23, 2011
So I've been living in Winnipeg for awhile. I feel like I've been in some kind of rehab to immerse myself back into normal life. I've been all about this "work hard play hard" lifestyle for so long that I got stuck into this fast paced routine, and I didn't know how to slow down and enjoy simple things anymore. All in all, it was worth it. I pulled off about an 80 average in my first year of university and I have a direction I can go towards but now I'm ready to relax and learn how to be self sufficient again. I'm not a fan of university life in Saskatoon because I become so dependent on my parents. Eventually living with them wore me down until I was clinging onto the boney fingers of depression. I was living an amazing life of shooting photos, partying, schooling, and a good job that I enjoyed at West 49, but in the end it was becoming repetitive and I just had to leave. I was so busy I felt like I was losing the close bonds with all my friends. It's hard to become close to someone when you want to be friends and spend time with everyone. I've been in Winnipeg for almost a month now and I'm ashamed to say that I don't miss home much. I love home to death but I just wore myself down until I was sick of it. I lived and partied the shit out of that city. It's nice to be somewhere where I don't know anybody. Yesterday I went to the forks market and bought some local food, visited my friend Eden at the smoothie bar, and today I watched Jersey Shore. I used to not care for the show but it cleared out my head. I have a habit of thinking too much, so watching it helped me learn to wind down and stop thinking fast paced for a bit. It helped me to forget my high tension past at home and help me realize "okay I'm here. I can live differently now, and how I choose to live here is my choice." I'm constantly changing my lifestyle but that's just part of developing who you are. Now I'm just trying to sort out my next steps and directions.